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"IT`S A BOY" I shouted, tears rolling down my face "I DON`T BELIEVE IT. A BOY!" It was at that moment I chose never to visit Thailand again.
I should run for political office just to see what kind of scandalous dirt they dig up. It would be nice to piece together my twenties.
She walked in & she had legs, legs that went on for days. Who knows where they went? They just kept wenting. - Why my mystery novel failed
A telephone survey says that 51 percent of college students drink until they pass out at least once a month. The other 49 percent didn`t answer the phone.
Yankee Doodle went to town, riding on a pony; he stuck a feather in his hat, and called it macaroni… That folks, is what drugs do to you.
My husband is not allowed to help with math anymore. Apperently 4 = 6.5 in his reality.
I’ve been searching for my stolen bed. And I won’t rest until I find it.
Whenever I give money to the homeless, I get yelled at that "they are just gonna buy booze with it". All I can think is ... Oh like I wasn`t ..
Sorry I said "at least it`s healthy" when you asked me how cute your baby was.
When asked `What would you bring with you to a deserted island`, how come no one ever replies, `A boat.`?
Real friends show me their boobs
The object of golf is to play the least amount of golf.
According to new research, too much sex can cause memory loss. Finally, something that explains my ultra detailed photographic memory.
To help reduce cost, this status was typed in china.
What kind of downward spiral would cause a person to "like" cream cheese on Facebook?