Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
A world without women would be a pain in the a$$.
I don’t just say crazy things on the internet, I do that in real life too.
What`s the right age to stop running naked from the bedroom to the bathroom?
Just joined the support group Hokey Pokey Anonymous ... A place to turn yourself around. ;)
Dear facebook, please quit asking me what`s on my mind. Eventually I`m going to get in trouble if I keep telling you.
Dating a single mother is like pressing continue on some one elses saved game
Sometimes I go on Google Earth and just spin the sh!t out of the world & pretend I`m making everyone really dizzy.
Humans claim to be the superior species, but a penguin can use its own body as a toboggan so who`s the real winner?
No matter which path you choose, there will always be some asshole in front of you trying to make a left.
I hope I can still remember the dance to Thriller when I become a Zombie.
There`s a bald spot in my yard so I`m gonna let the grass grow around it really long and then do a comb over.
Everyone, please... a moment of silence for all my married friends who have a shared Facebook account.
My psychiatrist told me I need to love myself more. I was like, "damn doc I`m already up to 3 times a day"
I don`t think the guy below me understands how this works.
Oh, honey, you have gone beyond muffin top. That`s a busted can of biscuits!