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So they say that having to much sex can cause memory loss, which is just a little something I seem to remember reading in a Rolling Stone magazine once on page 64 paragraphs 3 through 5 while sitting on a park bench October 14th 2002 at 3:46 p.m
When a girl tells you she has a nipple piercing, the correct response is always "I don`t believe you."
Yikes. don`t google "cream pies", google "cream pie recipes"
Do you ever go on youtube just to watch a music video then 5 hours later you find yourself watching a tutorial on how to talk to a giraffe?
My dad says that if I don`t stop typing so loudly, he`s gonna slam my face into the fidbdiUHy6hivIifHfGK
I have NEVER faked a sarcasm in my life ;)
Never tell a lie ... unless it is absolutely convenient
The only thing I ever win playing McDonald’s Monopoly is 10 pounds.
People are so predictable..I bet you`re even reading this status right now.
I hope I die doing something extreme like climbing Mt. Everest or telling a woman I don`t like her new haircut.
CPR is the human version of blowing in to a video game cartridge hoping it`ll work again.
I thought there`d be more sex during my sexual prime.
People will believe anything if you whisper it.
Nothing embarrasses a psychic more that throwing them a surprise party.
I was driving thru Farmville and I had to pee ... so I pulled over and fertilized your crops