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I wonder what "don`t touch" is in Braille.
Alway be nice to anyone that has full access to your toothbrush.
I need plastic surgery to fix whatever it is about my face that gives people the impression I want to hear about their relationship problems.
I wish there was an observation deck at WalMart.
Not to brag but my new mistress is a lingerie model. OK, fine. A mannequin. But she doesn`t talk much and I like that.
My favorite thing about marriage is sharing a house with the person most likely to murder me.
I`ve started an elimination diet, It`s where I eliminate anyone from my life who talks about their diet.
Here`s a joke for all you mind readers...
had a great time horseback riding today but then I ran out of quarters
I try to avoid trouble but I think it likes me.
I just spent ten minutes waving back to a guy in a storefront window before I realized he was just cleaning the glass.
I finally did it. I gave my cat a bath today. It really wasn`t that bad. She enjoyed it. I enjoyed it. Other than the fur sticking to the roof of my mouth, it went well.
Eww!!! Beer does NOT taste good on Cocoa Puffs! ..I`m switching back to my Fruit Loops! ;)
There was no bonus fry at the bottom of the bag. But the story has a happy ending. I found it later in my sports bra.
I`ve been single for a while and I have to say, it`s going very well. Like... It`s working out. I think I`m the one.