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Computer froze? Just press all the keys.
I wonder if any Disney managers ever start a meeting off with "What kind of Mickey Mouse operation are we running around here?"
If you speak too slowly, I will complete all your sentences in my mind in ways that makes your story much more interesting
They say when life gives you lemons….but what if life hands you a rather large banana? What then, my friend? What then?
My girlfriend says I shouldn`t plan things so far in advance. Well, she`s not my girlfriend yet.
These police take Hide and Seek really seriously.
I used to have superpowers but the psychiatrist took them away.
I like to make up words just to keep my auto correct in check.
I’m starting to think we as a society may be trying to do too much with the Dorito.
I roasted a turkey today, but I don`t think he got the jokes.
You`re the one who wore a red and yellow scarf to class. So don`t look at me weird for shouting "10 points for gryffindor" when you answer questions cause I know you wanted this. -Bfanch
I`m never free but I`m available.
I got in touch with my musculine side today - laying on the couch all day, eating gross food, playing games...
Milk Duds: When you want some candy but also crave a dislocated jaw
It`s weird how many people at my office are named "Hey."