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I don`t think I could love any person as much as I love BACON... Mmmmm Bacon...
I noticed you stopped taking your meds. Can I have them?
I saw a guy today at Starbucks. He had no smartphone, tablet or laptop. He just sat there drinking his coffee. Like a psychopath.
If by sexy you mean me licking the donut icing off my fingers then yes I can be damn sexy.
Ladies, when it comes to stalking, I`m 100% behind you.
If you think your having a bad day ... You could be digging your own grave at gun point and find buried treasure.
When I squeeze a tube of `whitening toothpaste` and it’s blue, I’m like, well this is off to a bad start.
There was a glorious time, before social media, when you would just lose touch with people.
Improve your memory by doing unforgettable things.
I don`t understand when people say `age is just a number`... Age is clearly a word.
Thanks to Netflix I can tell my doctor I`ve done a lot of "marathons"
"It`s not about who`s right or wrong."~ The person that is wrong
I don`t hate you, but I hope you fall in love and get married.
Does running out of money count as exercise?
Growing up teachers always told me there was no such thing as a stupid question. Eight years in retail has determined that was a lie.