Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Dear Customer Service: First of all, you should know that I`m typing this with my middle finger.
How to make friends: 1. Tell people you have weed.
I like holding the door for people who are far away, you know so they have to run a little.
Money can`t buy you happiness, but it does give you the ability to rent it until you die.
I wish we had staff meetings in the garden. The plants would`ve love the fertilizer.
"May the 4th" be with you!
I`m not saying that I`ve been online too long, I`m just saying that when I close my eyes I scroll through my thoughts
I miss the old days when street gangs asserted their dominance through aggressive hair combing.
Saying something stupid and thinking “Yeah, that sounded way better in my head"
You`re the reason I wake up everyday. Just kidding I have a job.
Did you know , that if you use asterisk , you can do anything you want ? * gets on a t-rex and gallops away into the sunset *
I’m on a forgotten-name basis with quite a lot of people.
I say the things better left unsaid.
My biggest fear is that there is no PMS and this is my personality.
It’s not the holiday season unless you push your body to the brink of alcoholism and diabetes.