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Cranked the treadmill up to MAX for 15 minutes. When I finally took a break my roller skates were hot to the touch.
If women really knew what men think, there would be restraining orders on all men.
It’s fun to pull someone’s leg… but don’t ever pull their finger.
Going to: ? Paris ? New York ? London ? KITCHEN... I`m hungry
What if cell phones are part of an elaborate plot to rid the world of phone booths so Superman has nowhere to change?
I said "sad face emoji" instead of actually frowning today if you want to know how out of touch with reality I am.
I got my stomach by doing as many crunches as I can everyday. Usually either Nestle or Captain.
Time is precious ... waste it wisely!
Although no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending.
My body is made up of 90% water, 5% pizza and 5% wine.
If someone says β€œyou’re funny” instead of laughing, you’re not.
Whoa. I just did something & almost forgot to document it on facebook. That was a close one.
Been reading up on the thesaurus lately because a mind is a terrible thing to garbage.
How dare the NFL build walls to keep fans that haven`t paid for a ticket from entering the game!
If I keep hitting the treadmill like I do every night, in a few weeks maybe I`ll learn to turn on the light when I get up to pee in the dark