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Must be my day for Mis-Advertizing --- I just ate a Bowl of Cheerios ----- and they DIDN`T make me Happy!!!! FML!!! :-P
My husband told me that he would leave me if I didn`t give up all my bad habbits.....I nearly choked on my toe nail!
Of all the lies I tell, "I was just kidding!" is my favorite.
I have a life outside of internet, it involves charging my phone.
Dear Maytag: Why don`t your dryers have a Fold cycle? It`s 2018 for chrissake!
Soup of the day: Beer
So, is Dora 18 yet, or what? Asking for a friend.
Whenever I try cleaning my room I either end up making a bigger mess, or just playing with the stuff I thought I lost.
I changed my name in my daughters phone to God...just texted her and said "I saw that"
To-Do List : Nothing[?]
I always find the "easy-open tab" right after I finally manage to tear the package open with my teeth.
Dreams are like pictures. I don`t care about yours unless I`m in them.
My internet was down for almost 4 mins,im ok but the 911 operator was a total b**ch about it!
If there is such thing as a fake noodle, does that make it an impasta?
Bands who can`t afford a smoke machine should hire my girlfriend to cook at their concert