Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I have thought a lot about it and I am thrilled to announce that I have decided to never die.
You don`t have to like me, I`m not a Facebook status.
My panic room is a walk-in beer cooler at the liquor store.
Lake Superior really needs to lose the attitude.
I bet Jellyfish are sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish.
That "No alcohol beyond this point." sign might as well say "I bet you can´t chug that whole beer!"
You should get at least 8 hours of beauty sleep... 9 if you`re an ugly bitch...
The only thing actually impossible in life is taking a picture for a group of women and having ALL of them like it.
You would be amazed how cheap lawn mowers are at Home Depot when you own a pickup truck and a orange apron.
You can always count on me to feel you up when you`re feeling down
"What`s wrong?" "Oh it`s personal" Then, why`d you post it to Facebook.
Maybe this comment wont be important for you guys here. Some of you will ignore it, most of yall wont bother to read and it`ll go unnoticed along with some others. maybe I`ll be criticized for this but I just want to let yall know I`m selling potatoes
On a scale of 1-10, I give this day a middle finger.
I just realized that I haven`t done the "Hockey Pokey" in over 10 years. I guess when you get older, you just forget what it`s all about.
has a Massive drinking problem ... there is no alcohol in the house!