Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
You millennials and your obsession with public healthcare. Back in my day we just died
There is no such thing as a stupid question, but there are such things as stupid people who ask questions.
Thank you Lord for this delicious meal we are about to Instagram.
I wonder if the Ziploc bag company secretly lobbies to keep marijuana illegal.
"Mary had a little lamb. That`s had." - the wolf
I`ve just invented an invisibility cloak; anything under it is rendered completely invisible. I`m still working out the kinks; you can still see the cloak itself
My dog reminds me of my ex. She doesn`t pull her weight financially and she`s scared of the vacuum.
I’d go to the gym but I’m still tinkering with the ultimate workout playlist I started three years ago.
I wonder if there are any times on the clock that I have never seen.
Can anyone tell me how to become a illegal immigrant, their benefits are undeniably more superior to our own.
I find that some of the best jokes are the ones that drag you in slowly and then leave you waiting in antici...
My new voicemail: “If you have reached this recording, please hang up and text me.”
The world would be a cleaner place if we gave blind people brooms instead of canes...
I went to the store to buy some comdoms and the cashier asked me If I needed a bag ? "I replied No she`s not that ugly"
I hope when Bruce Willis dies, it`s from a Viagra overdose. That way the headline can read "Bruce Willis Died Hard".