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Do not treat a woman like an object. It hates that...
I laid awake all night again worrying about why I’m always so tired.
Clearly the people that design refrigerators don`t know me if they think one tiny cheese drawer and two giant vegetable drawers is the way to go.
Thank you, True Crime, for saying that was a reenactment. I was pretty upset your camera person didn`t stop that murder.
Sugar` is the only word in English that starts with `su` and sounds like `sh`. I`m sure of it.
I can only please one person a day...and today is not your day!
My wife hasnt stopped looking through the window since it started raining. If it gets worse, I might have to let her back in...
If kindness really kills, you`ll always be completely safe around me.
I`m having a problem in Call Of Duty, I go to the menu and... ok by now the girls have stopped reading this, anyone know any good porn sites?
Who decided that we should sit together in groups while we chew food?
You never know how dirty a song’s lyrics are…until you hear a child sing them.
75% of men kiss their wives good bye when leaving the house. 100% kiss their house good bye when leaving their wives.
Lord please give me the strength not to go all Dexter on this mother f%#*er ... Amen
In case I drink too much and pass out for a while, Merry Christmas you guys.
Conserve energy: How would you feel if someone turned you on and then left?