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When I`m bored, nobody texts me. But as soon as I`m busy, BAM! ... still nobody texts me.
20 years from now, one of the hardest things our kids will be faced with is finding a screen name which is not already taken!
When I want to trim down my friend`s Facebook list I give my opinion and let nature do the rest.
Remember when phones were stupid and people were smart?
NERD WEDDING: Instead of saying “I do.” They say “I accept the terms & conditions.”
Bathtub` spelled backwards is still `bathtub`. It`s not, but for a second there, you believed me.
I am a Mother hear me roar.....especially when my kids decide to make a kite out of my granny panties and fly it down the street.
I wasn`t going to get so many groceries, but there was a new girl working today and she took my check.
Early reports indicate I`m gonna be drunk all weekend.
Sometimes I meet people and feel sorry for their dog.
I don`t know what I would do without Facebook, but I`m sure it would be something more productive
I`ve accidentally swallowed a load of scrabble pieces.........My next poop could spell trouble.
How many times do I have to say "excuse me" before "get the f*ck out of my way" becomes acceptable?
Fun Fact: Over 97.8% of men have already made mistakes this year that a woman will remind him about for the rest of his days.
If we all had to wear a warning label, what would yours say?