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I noticed the toilet roll incorrectly installed in your selfie.
If you say married people aren’t having sex, you have obviously never sat in a hotel bar & watched them pick up strangers.
Hard butter is the devil.
It isn`t a successful BBQ until an intoxicated idiot runs face first into a sliding glass door. I`m fine by the way.
DO NOT LIKE THIS… Unless you’re a sexy beast.
Just finished my first book yesterday. 450 pages. Man, that was a lot of coloring...
Hi, im _____ but you could call me sexy.
These old people at the bus stop really suck at paintball.
I am the undefeated champion of this”smooshing-down-the-garbage-so-I-don’t-have-to-take-it-out-for-another-day” game.
If you scream in a library, people just look at you funny. If you scream on an airplane, everyone joins in.
I got a free wallet and watch today. It`s like this gun is magic.
Drunk is when you feel sophisticated…but can’t pronounce it.
I have removed all the unhealthy food from my house ... It was delicious.
life is short play naked
Can anybody PLEASE tell me where you buy Common Sense?? I know several people that need some!!!