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Karaoke bars combine two of the world’s great evils: People who shouldn’t drink and people who shouldn’t sing.
I saw a fat kid sitting on a seesaw all by himself. I stopped and waited for another kid to fall from the sky. I left disappointed.
Seems like Pizza Hut should be able to afford a house by now.
Times change When I was a kid, werewolves and vampires were very scary. Now everyone wants to have sex with them
I`m afraid to hug fat girls....what if they`re hungry?
You know what`s more miraculous than a video with a million view but no dislikes on YouTube? The detention sheet empty for my class.
My New Years resolution is to be more assertive if that`s okay with you guys?
I don`t know why I think I could survive the Zombie Apocalypse, I cant even handle the puff of air at the eye doctor.
no..i am not drunk, floors needs hugs too ! :p
Tried cleaning the house to the A-Team theme and ended up building a tank. So close.
Thanks to Netflix I can tell my doctor I`ve done a lot of "marathons"
Last night I was walking the sexiest girl ever home until she turned around and saw me.
I just realized that I haven`t done the "Hockey Pokey" in over 10 years. I guess when you get older, you just forget what it`s all about.
My blood hound was just attacked by a Crip hound.
Who called them fake potatoes and not imitaters.