Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
You feel naked without your phone, I feel naked without my clothes.
Is it wrong to tell a knock knock joke to a homeless person ?
The 3 fastest means of communication: Telephone, Television, Tell-a-woman.
It’s hard to get a lot done when you’re busy having a snack every 15 minutes
Dont let facebook fool you we aint friends
You know you`re getting old when cops make you feel safe instead of nervous.
Did you ever stop to think that maybe vodka is addicted to ME?
If someone tells you "it`s better than sex" they`re not doing the sex right.
No one`s going to do it for you. It`s up to you, to make naps a priority in your life.
I have reliable inside information about Apple`s next product. I will not be able to afford it.
They say you are what you eat, though... I don`t recall eating a sexy beast today
10% of people genuinely care about your problems. The other 90% are glad that you’ve got them.
First you told me to be myself now you`re telling to me not be an idiot. Make up your mind woman!
If A-B-C-D didn`t drag out their part of the Alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn`t have to be so rushed.
I can`t believe these women are just walking around with yoga mats like a game of yoga might just break out at any moment