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Just slung my bra off & threw it to the other side of the couch where there are already 2 other bras. If my math is right, it`s Wednesday.
Instead of calling in sick, call in well. Tell them how great you feel not having to go to work today.
Take my advice, I don’t use it anyway.
I just let my mind wander, but it didn’t come back yet.
I wish I had a dollar for every dollar I don`t have.
I just don’t want to look back and think “I could’ve eaten that.”
Still no news on the royal baby. One will assume its being delivered by Royal Mail
After four centuries, the semicolon has finally achieved it`s true calling: helping people wink online.
If my body is EVER found dead on a designated jogging trail.. Just know I was murdered elsewhere and dumped there.. :|
An egg salad is really just a chicken salad that is really underdone.
I don’t have a problem with friends who ask to borrow money. I love a good laugh as much as the next guy.
I was doing laundry today and accidentally left out a very large fart. 4 people turned around. For a minute, I thought I was on "The Voice".
you`re about as useless as a red light in grand theft auto
I hate it when I open Facebook and miss a week of work.
If flying is really so safe, then why is it called the `terminal`?