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I am currently unsupervised ... I know, it freaks me out too. But the possibilities are endless!
It`s so hard to find obedient minions
I did responsible things all day so tonight will consist of nothing that even resembles responsibility.
Just been informed that my spirit animal is Eeyore.
My hand is stuck in a Pringles can. I`ll just leave it there. I`m not hiding who I am anymore.
The best thing about owning a Smart Car is if you get too drunk at the bar you can just carry it home.
Old video games couldn`t be won. They just got harder and harder until you died. Just like real life.
If only I did everything with the same precision in which I craft my sandwiches.
I know she`s talking about rain but I don`t like hearing my mom say she got 6 inches
Girl: I have changed my mind. Boy: Thank God! Does the new one work?
I dropped my affordable health care because I couldn`t afford it .
I almost forgot to upload a pic of my Starbucks coffee. What a waste of coffee that would have been!
Don´t you just hate it when people say stuff in their status that you really didn´t want to know? I hate that. Anyway, I gotta go poop.
To help reduce cost, this status was typed in china.
Pretty impressed at petrol station today, as i was filling up, i heard woman with truck at next pump say is that Vin Diesel, I smiled, then realised she meant Van Diesel :-/