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A friend doesn`t question your motive, they just keep their mouth shut and dig.
Chuck-E-Cheese, because it`s never too early to introduce your child to poor nutrition and gambling..
I really love it when a hot girl winks at me with both eyes.
The only problem with sarcasm is, it only works on intelligent people.
If you`re married and having trouble, ask "what would Jesus do?" then remember that jesus was never married.
The older I get, the more I enjoy being bored.
I`ll be drinking tell I see Leprechauns tonight.
Life is funnier when you have a dirty mind. ;)
If my week was a YouTube video, Monday would be that crappy ad that doesn`t let you skip.
Example of the difference between `You`re`and `Your`: 1. "You`re nuts" = "You are nuts" 2. "Your nuts" = "What about my nuts?"
Yes, that`s correct. And the horse you rode in on.
“You look tired” is just a polite way to tell someone they look like sh*t.
I`m going to become a hermit as soon as I find a cave with a decent wifi connection.
The Olympians stories are amazing! The Ukrainian whose family was killed, the Korean who escaped slavery, the American who never had wifi.
What do I look for in a girl? Well she has to be hot. And well-rounded. And cheesy. Extra guac. Wait, wrong list, this is my Chipotle order.