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is pretty sure there´s a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking...And I plan on finding out what that is.
Hey ladies breastfeeding in public,...Why don`t you ever smile in my pictures?
Friends are like boobs... Some are real some are fake.
I woke up this morning and my "check liver" light was on.
I spend 95% of the time out of bed wishing I was back in bed
My birthday is coming up. I dont like to think of it as getting older I like to think of it as experience points.
The next time you feel you’re worthless…. just remember…. your organs are worth a LOT of money on the black market.
Facebook has suggested that I POKE you.
Despite the high cost of living, it still remains popular.
If money cant buy happiness,explain beer!
Hit the popcorn button on my microwave but none has appeared yet.
If couples who are in love are called `love birds.` Then couples who always argue should be called `angry birds.`
5 symptoms of laziness –> 1.
I think Facebook now comes under the housework category.
Keep your friends close and your unattractive enemies closer so you look better by comparison in pictures.