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I once tried sniffing coke, but the ice cubes kept getting stuck up my nose.
Lil Wayne is 10% African-American and 90% tattoo.
Attention fuels immaturity
Fun game: Borrow some tools from your neighbor and return them one by one covered in blood, until they move...
"Let`s eat, get drunk and watch people exercise" - sports fans
Synonym: Word used in place of the one you can`t spell.
Babies are so cute because none of them are mine.
Today`s Horoscope: You`re gullible
Being an adult is a lot like going to the vet. We`re all excited for the ride until we realize what it`s like where we`re going.
Today is National Fritters Day. I don`t know what that means, so I just went naked today. Gotta be something like that.
My doctor said I need to drink more water every day, so I have started putting ice cubes in my vodka.
I went to see the doctor today for my annual check-up. The good news is the he says I`m healthy as a horse. The bad news is he uses large farm animals to
Don`t understand how people in depression commercials can be sad with how attractive they are.
If you boil a clown, do you get laughing stock?
I like to start my day by taking a shower, having some coffee and going online for 14-16 hours.