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It`s funny how when you post a status and some people think it`s about them..Hahahaha it was.
"I`m sorry" and "I apologise" mean the same thing...except when you`re at a funeral.
My bank is the worst. They`re charging me money for not having enough money in my account. Apparently, I can`t even afford to be broke.
For $60, this printer ink had better be hand squeezed out of endangered squids.
The buses don`t go where you live do they.
My job description does not include farting on everyone else`s office chairs but I still do it because INITIATIVE.
I just ate Pasta and Anti-Pasta, but they annihilated each other, now I am hungry again.......
I say ” I shouldn’t be telling you this,” at the beginning of every conversation so people will listen to what I’m saying.
Why do people say "Tuna Fish sandwich?" That`s like saying "Chicken Bird sandwich."
How do Amish girls know if it`s a romantic candle lit dinner or just a regular one #DeepThoughts
These energy drinks make sitting on the couch so much more exciting.
Anyone knows when is Facebook sending us the W-2 forms
I put the “Pro” in Procrastinate.
The problem with money is too much of it belongs to people who aren’t me.
I wouldn`t do much for a Klondike Bar; I would however get naked for beer.