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Home is where the pants aren`t.
If it wasn’t for caffeine I wouldn’t be a functioning member of society.
Hey chicks that only post inspirational shit: we know you’re nuts.
Here`s to ignoring our real problems and getting outraged about something on the internet.
Stop complaining about being single!!, we have bigger problems here. Like why McDonalds don`t serve breakfast after 10:30 -.-
There is no evidence that exists that life should be taken seriously.
Scientist Proved That There are more Than 124786534688644478 People Living In This world who are Too Lazy To Read The Above Number...!!!
Slowly, Waldo`s wife and Mr. Sandiego started putting the pieces together.
My doctor said I’m healthy enough for sex, just not attractive enough.
Not sure yet why this cookie dough has baking instructions on the package.
If nobody hates you, you are doing something boring.
OMG, what a day I had. If Monday was a guy, I`d punch him in the throat!
Everytime I see a person jogging I already know they have facebook, everyone on facebook works out.
You don`t get smarter as you get older. There just aren`t any stupid things left that you haven`t already done.
I wonder who Jason Waterfalls is and why did TLC not want him to go...