Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Change of plans everyone: NOBODY Wang Chung tonight.
I don`t like making plans for the day, because then the word "premeditated" gets thrown around in the courtroom.
I always wonder if the people sitting near me at church every Sunday are unsettled by the fact that I take my communion like a shot of cheap vodka because I`m still in a party mode
"Stay out of the heat & stay hydrated." Thank you news-anchor. It`s my first summer.
I hate that I have to put on clothes to participate in society.
I just caught my husband smiling in his sleep. He`s going to pay for that later.
Key to a great marriage ... Lack of imagination.
why would you go outside? that`s where bugs live
You had me at "I hate that b!tch too".
I am not as think as you drunk I am
More celebrities should donate blood. I mean, imagine having the blood of Will Smith running through your veins.
I`ve never done any mistake twice... three, four times may be!
Sitting out in my front yard pointing a hair dryer at speeding cars to see if any slow down.
Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
Remember....... Its not drinking alone if you`re on Facebook ;)