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That urge you get to write, "No one cares" on someone`s status.
Women are like bacon: They look good, They smell good, They taste good, And they will kill you slowly.
You must have been born on a highway. Most accidents take place there.
Friend told me that on her strict new diet, she eats each meal naked in front of a mirror. I said would you like to come over for dinner?
Please don`t post pictures of cats on my FB wall. I am allergic.
I hardly know you…. but, Facebook says it’s your birthday, so happy birthday!
I went to open a can of Whoop-Ass but it had a child-proof lid.
My favorite Yoga Pose is the Upward Facing Couch Potato.
I feel like I am losing my mind !!! But as long as I can keep the bit that tells me when to pee, I should be OK !!
Calling all men...Eboli can live up to two months in semen..YES! You better wash your socks.
I see you posted a photograph of snow with the caption "it`s cold" could you tell me more about that
What idiot called it a driver`s test and not a Game of Cones?
From all these shows I`ve watched it seems like snipers lay down a lot of the day....I`d probably be pretty good at that job.
A guide to hating people. Step 1: get to know them.
I`m sorry. . . I didn`t mean to stare. . . it`s just that I have never seen stupid of this magnitude up close before