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Some will forget, the others are simply women.
With all the technology these days, you`d think they would come up with an Online Gym where losing weight would be a click away
Just bought a Ken doll. I don`t know what everyone`s talking about, you can`t read books on this thing.
Was there even food before people started posting pictures of it on Instagram?
I hate Cheetos stains on my peignoir.........
To those of you who received a book from me as a Christmas present: just to let you know that they are due back at the library tomorrow.
I`m beginning to think that my destiny in life is just to be a bad example that other people can learn from.
This beer sure tastes like I`m on vacation next week!
According to new research, too much sex can cause memory loss. Finally, something that explains my ultra detailed photographic memory.
"That looks interesting. I think I`ll eat it." - Sharks and Toddlers
Behind every good selfie is approximately 47 nearly identical pictures that didn`t make the cut.
You know you can`t say "happiness" without saying "p*nis"
Picking your nose doesn`t make you a bad person. .... but what you do with the booger will define you.
I’ve found that I can usually judge how hot a woman is by how many times my girlfriend calls her a whore.
I just bought some new deodorant yesterday. The instructions said to remove the top and push up bottom. My butt hurts now but every time I fart the room smells awesome.