Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
If you raise your children, you spoil your grandkids. If you spoil your children, you raise your grandkids.
Laugh now, but at the rate they are reproducing, the people of Walmart may one day take over the world
I made a chicken salad today... The little bastard didn`t even eat it.
Sorry I yelled "April Fool`s" while you were proposing to your girlfriend.
I think even hospital gowns cover more than my insurance does...
"Dora" only rhymes with "Explorer" if you`re from Long Island, New York
What does envelope 1 of 3 on my credit card bill mean?
Social media is great if you like socializing without wearing pants.
Apparently dyslexia is not a good excuse for driving 53 in a 35.
Please don`t make me choose between you and porn.
Don`t, under any circumstance, believe I`ll return your Tupperware.
There is nothing more terrifying than sneezing while driving.
I tried yoga and I think my downward dog looked more like winnie the pooh getting stuck in rabbit`s door.
The iPad: Because the iPhone was too small for other people to notice you.
I fake my lol`s