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I bet the "YMCA" dance is a lot harder to do in different languages
After watching copious amounts of crime dramas I`ve come to the conclusion that serial killers only target women who wear matching bra and pantie sets. Feeling much safer now.
A recent survey of one person revealed that 100% of me thinks I should skip work tomorrow.
All I want is some ketchup packets placed in the bag, without having to ask!
There`s a word for people like you ... "leave"
If you are a turkey right now and someone offers to cut off your head, stuff you full of dressing, and cook you, do not do it. It is a trap.
"I don`t trust you to not buy drugs" -people who give gift cards
Every new day means new opportunities... to make mistakes and f*ck things up.
Not clicking like on this status makes your a$$ look fat.
Don`t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.
Turns out, I`m not an afternoon person either...
What ? Who ? Exactly my point. Now move along and go read something else. Nosey !!
This coworker is about to find out walking around smiling on a Monday always leads to workplace accidents.
I took two years of Spanish in high school, so ordering off the Taco Bell menu is super easy for me.
You haven`t truly tested your patience yet until you get stuck behind an undecided person at a Redbox kiosk.