Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
A lot of people are very competitive when playing stupid.
They keep saying the right person will come along, I think mine got hit by a truck.
This morning I got in touch with my inner self. And that`s also the last time I`ll buy cheap toilet paper...
My wife`s credit cards were stolen last week. I haven`t reported it yet though...because so far, they are spending less than she was.
Girls who don`t get naked when you`re drunk.. Explain yourselves.
According to maxipad commercials, all women are full of blue windshield washer fluid...
Dear middle finger: thank you for always sticking up for me.
Anyone else find it odd that on Star Trek, when they "boldly go where no one has gone before" they always end up meeting someone?
The trouble with being punctual is that nobody`s there to appreciate it.
Saw a chameleon today, so I`m assuming it wasn`t a very good one.
My friend said the only vegetable that could make him cry was an onion. That was before I hit him in the face with a watermelon.
Kids maybe a gift..... But I like playing with the box it came in.
I felt sorry for the hypnotist I saw last night…he hypnotized 7 guys…then dropped the mic on his foot and yelled F*CK ME ... what happened next will haunt me for the rest of my life
My Wife asked, "Would you like a romantic interlude?" I said, "Does a bear crap in the woods?". Wish I`d just said `Yes`, she`s been on Google ever since.
A girl who lives hundreds of miles away texting you “I’m drunk” is like a lasagna texting you from Italy saying “I’m delicious”