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Alcoholic? No. Self-appointed booze quality control technician? Yes.
I`ve been told my posts are too depressing but what does it matter. We`ll all be dead soon anyway.
Had a blast doing my Black Friday tradition!!!! I slept!
I wonder if people without dogs actually pick food off the floor?
Bring a CD into my car that I "have to hear" and I`ll figure out a way to deploy the passenger side airbags
Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they tested positive for WD40.
If you don’t like something change it... if you can’t change it....post it on facebook, so we can "like it" and laugh..
Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but my boss just gets mad when I don`t come into work.
As funny as it might be, It`s never polite to yell "Tuba Lesson!" Before farting.
Everyday I run into someone who pushes me past the limits of my medication.
I`m not a bitch, I just have a low bullsh!t tolerance.
If I can’t act weird around you, I’m sorry we can’t be friends.
To all my friends who sent me best wishes for 2013, for 2014 could you please send money, alcohol or petrol vouchers…Cheers!
I’ve never been a millionaire, but I know I’d be excellent at it.
Notice how writers don’t rewrite books, how about we stop remaking movies.