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That`s weird, all this time I thought the Birds and the Bees was a dance from the 50`s.
Quiet people have the loudest minds.
You girls are lucky, tampons are changing the end from a string to a bit of tinsel but its only for the Christmas period
If you run into someone you know and they say "we should hang out sometime", say "I`m ready to hang out now" and watch them panic.
A psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
When two people love each other deeply, nothing is impossible. Except deciding on where to eat.
I would like to be a Disney Princess...You know, where I have random animals showing up to help with the housework!
I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.
I think you know you’ve got a problem when every letter of the alphabet triggers a porn bonanza in your address bar.
My wife’s cooking brings a whole new meaning to.. eat sh!t and die.
My kids are always accusing me of having a favorite child which is ridiculous because I don`t really like any of them.
Hey ladies who complain about falling in when we leave the toilet seat up; how about you first check if the runway is there before you bring the plane down.
If you wake up with a funny taste in your mouth on christmas morning...............just remember that santa only cums once a year. :D
A revolving door is an IQ test you can fail in public.
Me: I only smoke weed because of Cancer. Mom: You don`t have Cancer! Me: So it`s working...