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Just once I`d like to yell, "Don`t you know who I am?!" because I`m important, not because I`m drunk and actually forgot.
I BRIEFLY had an urge to clean ... but that lasted only 5 minutes .. whew! That was close! Lol
I don`t know what I would do without you, but I bet it`s awesome.
I only drink on two occasions; when its my birthday and when its not.
If you haven`t used your fingers to "expand" a picture in a Magazine today, well then you`re not me.
Minnesota is my favorite state that sounds like it`s a small soft drink.
Safe words are for quitters.
Think of a number between 0 and 20. Add 40 to it. Multiply by 2. Subtract 3. Now close your eyes.... It`s dark isn`t it.
It`s depressing to think how much more Dora the Explorer has seen and done in her life compared to mine.
I`m undecided about which pants to wear today...Smarty of Fancy?
They say that money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.
I like when people call me "Sir". I just wish they wouldn`t follow it up with "you`re making a scene."
Dr. Oz says having 1/2 hour of sex is equivalent to running 6 miles. I guess I`m going to the gym today.
Thanks to the presence of fools, wise people stand out.
Rabbits jump & they live for 8 yrs. Dogs run & they live for 15 yrs. Turtles don`t do anything & they live for 150 years. LESSON LEARNED!