Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Million dollar idea: Duck Dynasty chia pets.
More food should come with prizes inside it.
Of all the bands named after handicapped jungle animals, Def Leppard is my favorite.
Your family tree has a couple of coconuts
My girlfriend and I have an open relationship and will continue to do so right up until she finds out.
A wireless bra? They weren`t tricky enough, now I need a password?
Instead of calling it the John, I call my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.
Salary is like a menstrual cycle, it comes once a month and is gone in five days...
Asking a girl what exactly she looks for in a guy is like asking her "what exactly do I have to do to get friendzoned?
How many Oreos is too many?...Is it 25?...I feel like it should be more than 25
I`m tough and can take whatever life throws at me ... Especially if its dipped in chocolate first.
I slept and woke up. (ok, lately this has become a major accomplishment in my life)
The heart wants what the heart wants. *opens 12th beer*
"Estimated Time of Arrival" on the GPS. Challenge accepted!
If cats could text you back, they wouldn`t.