Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
It`s Thanksgiving. Don`t forget to set your scale back 25 lbs
Hi, it’s me. I can’t get to the phone right now, even though it’s right here in my hand.
Do bees even have knees?
One of the greatest things about owning a dog is how happy they are to see you even though you just stepped out of the house for 30 seconds.
I think all priuses are gay transformers living here on earth
Note to self: don’t set your password reminder as “you should know this”
2017 didn`t need that extra hour back.
When your girlfriend says do what ever you want. Do not do what ever you want!
Hey Gotham City criminals, why isn’t the first thing on your to-do list “Unplug the Bat Signal”?
You don’t truly know someone until you see how they react to their bag of chips getting stuck in a vending machine
OMG, you`re huge! There`s no way you`ll fit inside me.- My clothes probably.
I usually want to post intelligent and witty comments. But I end up posting stupid and funny ones so my friends can understand them.
Do the people inside mascot costumes also smile when they have their photos taken?
Man:Hello doc, my wife is having a baby. Doctor:Is this the first child? Man:No, it`s the husband speaking.
I feel sorry for men who don’t know how to value women. One look at a woman and I know how much she will cost me.