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Apparently I`m the only one that wants to drink beer at this intervention.
Nothing is more dangerous than a woman “gathering her thoughts”.
I hate it when people beg for likes, like if you agree?
Sorry I pissed you off, but I find you much more entertaining this way.
I never care whether or not my glass is half full or half empty... cause I drink straight from the bottle!
Did you know that one minute of kissing burns 26 calories? No wonder those sluts are so damn skinny.
Do you guys know there are "actual" people out there that don`t have a Facebook account? What the hell do they do all day?
Sometimes giving someone a second chance is like giving them an extra bullet for their gun because they missed the first time.
Why does Flo from Progressive needs to have an apron on to sell insurance. Is there something dirty about insurance we should know about?
Give fat people a break. They have a lot on their plate.
It`s my birthday. I’m not just a year older, I’m also a year better and prettier ... I know your jealous ;)
We played a lot of "Keep The Balloon In The Air" as kids, a game known to most other people as being poor.
My iPhone has 2 million times the storage of the 1969 Apollo 11 spacecraft computer. They went to the moon. I text a lot.
Every so often you come across a person that supplies you with endless motivation, even if it is just to jump into traffic.
If a group of midgets performed the YMCA song, it is to be considered that they did it in lowercase?