Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
How do they put the "do not walk on the grass" signs up?
For all of you who gossip about me: Thanks for making me the center of your world.
I get so confused when I`m about to watch a TV show or movie and "For Mature Audiences Only" appears on the screen. Can I watch or not?
That moment when you’re talking to yourself and you smile like an idiot, because you’re just so hilarious.
99% of people in this world are stupid. Luckily I`m part of the other 5%.
I`m proud to announce that I`m still the undefeated champion at racing with drivers who don`t know we`re racing.
I`m about to eat gas station breakfast. Tell my family that I love them.
The problem with alcohol is that... it wears off.
I don`t even think it`s possible for a bear to cook porridge.
You might call it ‘whipped.’ I call it `guy who’s getting laid.’
WOULD YOU RATHER: have six arms or giant antlers? (You don’t really get a choice; the surgeons were just sort of curious.)
The last time I was someone`s type, I was donating blood.
Being fabulous all day makes me really, really tired
They`re having a Jamaican hair-do day tomorrow at work. I`m dreading it.
I’m thinking there’s some type of filter that prevents normal people from like my page