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my wish for tonight is for the person reading this status to have a Good Night!
My trust issues began when there was no donkey in Donkey Kong.
Kleptomaniacs always take things literally.
If you really want to impress me with the year a bottle of wine was made, bring me one from 2024....
You don’t realize how many people you hate until you have to name a baby or a dog...
The guest of honour was a bit subdued. The Keyboardist was playing too softly for my liking. But it was a good turnout, lots of food and laughter. But break out into one choreographed `Thriller` dance routine and the crowd goes all apesh!t and tosses you out of the funeral home.
I bet wrecking ball operators are some of the happiest people in the world.
Bike helmets only protect you from looking cool.
I heard she was born naked!! That slut!
I`m undecided about which pants to wear today...Smarty of Fancy?
Every-time I walk over a sewer grate I look down into it hoping to catch a glimpse of a Ninja Turtle
I`m a big advocate of the `You started it` method of defense in an argument.
I see dead people. Well technically they`re stupid people, but give me a few minutes
I`ve accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles. My next crap could spell disaster.
My favorite exercise is a combination of a lunge and a crunch. It`s called lunch.