Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
You`re as useless as a referee in the WWE
You guys make Facebook worth it! Just kidding, we are all wasting our lives.
Whoever has my voodoo doll, please scratch between my butt cheeks..I`m in public.
Some people are training as complainers like it is a competitive sport
“100 Calorie Packs” roughly translated means “Eat Two or Three of These”
Make a random stranger`s day by walking up to them and saying "This isn`t real. You have to wake up"
Never give up on your dreams, keep sleeping.
I`m sorry but, I could not hear you over the sound of my internal hope that you would shut the f*ck up.
Whenever I see people lined up outside a club on Friday night, I just think “look at all these poor people who don’t know Netflix exists.”
Come on snooze button, is 9 minutes all you have to offer...I need something in the 2-3 hour range.
Wow, I just melted a piece of ice by staring at it. Took a little longer than I thought it would.
The color 9 is my favorite letter.
Studies show that if you begin a sentence with "studies show," the internet will believe you.
Which one of you is Moderation? I keep getting told we need to drink together.
If guns don’t kill people, but people kill people, then doesn’t that mean that toasters don’t toast toast, but instead toast toasts toast?