Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
It`s real cute how pedestrians confuse "right of way" with immortality.
Doing pretty good so far on my 1500 calorie a day diet as long as I don`t eat anything else today and tomorrow.
The further you push me away, the more I begin to enjoy viewing you from a distance.
How many men does it take to open a beer? None! It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.
WARNING:: going to bed on Sunday will cause Monday.
Difference between men and women: Women can change their mind whenever they want. Men can change their mind whenever the woman wants.
I didn´t outsmart you. You just outdumbed me.
New documentary movie about white trash ... I only saw the trailer...
Today`s Horoscope: You`re gullible
It`s a lot easier to chuck a co-worker in the dumpster than it is to listen to his problems.
I don`t know what I would do without Facebook, but I`m sure it would be something more productive
So I turned my phone onto " airplane mode" and threw it up into the air. Worst transformer ever!
When I see somebody get on one knee tying their shoe in public I get in front of them, happy cry, and say “Oh my GOD, I will, YES-YESS!”
I turned out ok for a kid raised in a large part by Bugs Bunny.
once you delete your birthday from Facebook, you realize no-one ever gave a sh!t about you all along!