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Just for kicks I posted "I won the LOTTERY" on Facebook. One girl liked it, then replied to the inbox message I sent her in 2010. *Blocked*
Waffles are just pancakes with abs.
I love tan lines... it`s like God came down and high-lighted all the good parts... ;-)
If there`s one thing that I`ve learned it`s, that I should have learned way more than one thing.
When people with multiple personality disorders are about to die, whose life flashes before their eyes?
Remember kids, NEVER light fireworks. Let the adults, who have been drinking all day, light them instead!
I ignored your Facebook friend request because there isn`t a "Hell no!" button.
The Brain ? Forgets what I want to remember, Remembers what I want to forget.
Adding “and sh!t” to the end of a sentence to make it sound cooler and sh!t.
I`m putting more thought into my Halloween costume than into my job.
Sorry I just saw your text from last night, are you guys still at the restaurant
When I`m in a good mood I act like I`m I`m in a bad mood so nobody approaches me and ruins my good mood.
According to my fitness app, I ate a 6 mile fruit roll-up.
Roses are red and sometimes they`re thorny, when I think of you, I get really ...............
people say nobody`s perfect..i made nobody!..