Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Wine is just grapes for procrastinators.
If we learned anything from the Mayans, it’s that if you don’t finish something, it’s not the end of the world
Lazy is a very strong word, I like to call it “selective participation.”
Let me check my giveashitmeter ... nope nothing.
H&R Block said I won`t get nearly as much back in taxes this year because apparently the neighbors want to claim their own children.
I`ve said it before and I`ll say it again, if you drive a Nissan but don`t call it Liam then what is even the point of you
50 notifications later I regret ever commenting on your status.
Don`t bother trying to figure me out...not even the little voices in my head understand me...it`s pointless.
I’m thinking of leaving my body to science. Even scientists need a good laugh now and then.
I`m not fat. My stomach is in 3D
I may have no one rocking my world right now, but I have no one ruining it either!
That awkward moment when you take a bath in the middle of the day and don`t know whether to wear normal clothes or pajamas.
If offering people gum is cooking, then yes, I cook.
If at first you don’t succeed, try doing it the way I told you to.
I’m watching this show on stalkers, still haven’t seen any of you yet.