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I shouldn`t play with Legos!? It says "Ages 7 & Up". 30 is higher than 7. Instead of calling me immature, you need to go take a math class.
If my job was to make health questionnaires, I`d slip in random stuff like "How fast can you run backwards?"
List of the most populated places in the world - 1. China 2. India 3. Friend Zone 4. United States 5. Indonesia
People say love is the best feeling ever. However I think finding a toilet right away when you have diarrhea is better.
finally joined craigs list. who wants to see my junk?
Nothing says "party" like a red plastic cup.
Lust is not real love and Tombstone is not real pizza, but both are fine when you`re drunk.
I just found out my smoke detector comes with a warranty. WHAT FOR? If it don`t work, what`s left?
The only sit up I do is the one I use to get out of bed.
I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and then six months later you have to do it all over again.
WARNING::World Health Organization says radiation from cell phones may cause cancer. Please text everyone you know about this.
Men think us women dream of finding the perfect man when really, all we want is to eat anything without getting fat.
Screw you, little sticker on fruit!
When we were kids, we didn`t have Pokemon Go. If we wanted to look for things that weren`t there, we would get stoned like normal people.
I wan`t you to know that someone cares. not me, but someone.