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Couldn`t stop thinking about that drought on the west coast while I was watering my driveway today.
How did the person who invented the first clock know what time it was?
If you want to ruin a song forever use it for your alarm.
Why do they write PIZZA all over the box? What else could possibly be in there???
Okay im going to make myself a sandwich, and i better have some votes when i come back. -.-
Ziploc`s idea of how big a sandwich should be is very different from mine.
I bet genies were a real thing until one jerk wished for genies not to exist anymore.
I hate when the weather man says there is a chance of sprinkles in the forecast...makes me want donuts!!
My hearing is fine. There`s no need to repeat yourself! I ignored you perfectly well the first time.
okay it was me..... I did it ..... I let the dogs out
I`m going to stand outside. So if anyone asks, I am outstanding.
Happy 15th birthday google, 3 more years and you will be able to search for adult sites legally
Hitting the lotto is a sure way to stop hating on Mondays...
I hate when I wake up in a strange house, & have to go outside to look at a license plate to figure out what state I`m in.
I don`t understand the saying "you snooze you lose"... I hit the snooze button 8 times this morning and feel like a champion.