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Email: 8 character min, including 1 upper, 1 lower, 1 number, 1 special character. ATM card: 4 numbers
Don`t rush me. I`m waiting for the last minute.
The hardest part of being a gentleman is going to all of these gentlemen’s clubs.
I`m more confused than a valet parking attendant at a Mary Kay convention.
Plan B includes margaritas.
I`m having one of those days where my middle finger is answering every question!!!
I hate those new parents who do the `baby talking`, yes I do, yes I do...
Not quite feeling myself today. I`m going to see if booze helps...
Its not you, it`s how you don`t make me sandwiches.
I`m obviously smarter than you`re
The leading cause of divorce ? ... marriage
When it`s raining I don`t work, when its sunny I don`t work, when its cloudy I call in sick!
Sad how some stick figures get stuck working the hangman game, while others get to have nice families on the back of SUVs
I`m fresh out of hopes and dreams. Can I interest any of you in despair and disappointment?
~WARNING~ I will more than likely offend you at some point in time