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My car is so old the high beam switch is on the floor...
So when a couple gets engaged on Facebook for April Fools it`s okay to comment "hahaha" but the rest of the year it`s rude??
Does anyone know where the off switch on a child is? I can’t seem to find it.
Why do people who insult themselves get mad when you agree with them?
Childless people wondering what it`s like to have some kiddos? Make a lovely healthy breakfast. Take it and throw it all over the floor.
Cant imagine the look on Obamas face when he saw `Olympus Has Fallen`..His next quote would have been.."No more Taiwans in the secret Elevetor office"
Wouldn`t it be awesome if MTV had a show called "16 and Applying to Colleges"
The kids left w/my parents for a week. I plan to run around the house for an hour yelling "woo hoo", but after that my schedule is wide open
A few bad decisions really liven up a boring day.
Do you ever start writing a status and half way through you’re just like… nah
Every so often, I like to go to the window, look up, and smile for a satellite picture.
Relationship status: Private. The only way for it to be.
Just picked the remote up off the floor with my feet while lying on the couch, so I guess today was leg day...
Ever since I installed AdBlock, all the single ladies in my area seemed to have lost interest.
The real fountain of youth is to have a dirty mind and a naughty smile.