Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sarcasm: because snapping a neck is frowned upon in a court of law.
Apparently there`s enough room in my mouth to put more than one foot.
There is no such thing as a stupid question, but there are such things as stupid people who ask questions.
Do you know who invented the Knock Knock joke? I don`t know either, but whoever did should get a no bell prize.
for some reason my plans to workout never work out
Whenever someone invites me to their home and I see more than 3 cars parked outside, I keep driving just in case it`s an intervention.
The bat signal seems pretty useless if they need Batman during the day.
i feel naked without my mobile !
Every shape I had to learn above octagon was just a total fu*king waste of time.
So if your invited to someone`s 4th marriage is it wrong to give them a gift certificate to a good divorce attorney?
Orion`s Belt is a huge waist of space.
I quit my job with the Dept of Corrections. That place was like a prison...
I want to meet the guy whose complaint led to cashiers asking me if it`s okay if they put the receipt in my bag.
When I die I`m going to go to heaven and God is going to be like nope, remember what you said on Facebook
Long story short, I love summaries