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You all take typos way too serious, you gays.
I would like to discuss tennis but I wouldn`t want to cause a racket
I`m not saying not to trust the Internet, but there is an alarming discrepancy between the number of iPads I`ve won and the number of iPads I own.
I`m lost, no wait..... Yep, lost for sure
Gym update: not there
Walking past a new employee`s desk & yelling, "Do you think it`s a good idea to be surfing porn on your first day?" will never get old.
You`re not living life right if you don`t get just a little bit nervous every time you hear a police siren.
I was only 6 numbers away from winning the powerball.
When things get to stressful I hit the jim.......... Beam.
Legalizing same sex marriage. I thought all sex was the same after marriage.
You`re in your 20`s... you don`t have "haters"... you have "adults" that think you are "annoying"
If your girlfriend has $15 and you have $30, your girlfriend actually has $45.
Okay restaurants. Enough with the clever bathroom signs. A simple M and F will do. Sincerely, drunk people.
The parents with the ugliest babies take and post the most pictures.
I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.