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No one is more confident than a drunk girl wearing a guy’s hat sideways.
My safe word is letsgetmarried.
hmm ... I wonder what I´m thinking?
"Okay" means you`re in the clear. "K" means you`re better off not coming home. Fellas, you know what I`m talking about.
I`m living in a drama-free bubble today. Respect the bubble people, respect it!
Remember, pretty much all of the “tough guys” you see on TV and movies were theater majors in college.
It`s unfortunate that most people will never run out of things to say.
If you are a turkey right now and someone offers to cut off your head, stuff you full of dressing, and cook you, do not do it. It is a trap.
"Last man standing" is the winner in most contests, but the runner up in musical chairs.
I think you know you’ve got a problem when every letter of the alphabet triggers a porn bonanza in your address bar.
Apologising does not mean you are wrong and the other person is right, it just means you value your relationship more than your ego.
The worst walk of shame is the one back onto the crowded elevator after getting out on the wrong floor.
Nice try blocked number, but I don`t even answer my phone when I know who`s calling.
I`m writing this status very slowly, cause I know you guys can`t read very fast.
Not a day goes by when I don`t try to use The Force.