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People need to stop putting flyers on my car. I don`t want to see a band called "Parking Violation" at the "Courthouse"
At the end of the day, life should ask us, βDo you want to save the changes?β
Always wonder why do people even bother making good quality pinatas?
I really think that Caller ID needs to be more detailed. It should say things like "Wants help moving" or "Will whine about bad relationship."
Iβm that kind of person who between two choices always pick the wrong one.
If "The Breakfast Club" was made today, it would be a silent film about five kids staring at their phone
My New Years resolution is to be more assertive if that`s okay with you guys?
A child`s purpose is to help their parents relearn the states and capitals.
I can`t believe people used to have to paint selfies.
Your screenshots of text message conversations tell me: 1. you have a great sense of humor 2. to never trust you
A secret is what you tell everyone not to tell anyone else.
Whenever you can`t think of anything to say in therapy just go with, "I`ve been thinking about killing you."
Can I just drop it like itβs luke warm? Itβs been a long day and Iβm tired.
Women say childbirth is the most painful thing... obviously they have never stepped on a Lego.
One problem with auto-correct is that you always end up posting some thong you didn`t Nintendo.