Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Sometimes you have to burn a few bridges, to stop the weirdos from following you.
Yes, your opinion matters ... But not to me.
Benefits of dating me: 1. You`re the smart one
My door is always open. So please feel free to leave.
Last year in college football Alabama beat Arkansas, Tennessee, and Auburn. Those teams coaches all resigned. Any chance of Alabama playing agsinst the White House this year?
I just saw a gang of really drunk mosquitoes leave my arm and high-five each other. Weird.
Ladies, life is short. So buy the shoes!
I`m a responsible person. People are always saying "I know you`re responsible for this."
The closest I`ve ever come to eating better is eating butter.
After all these years, I`m beginning to suspect that Waldo doesn`t want to be found.
Maybe my mom was right all those years ago. Maybe I won`t be happy until someone loses an eye. Maybe that`s what`s been missing.
I bet attractive people think the world is a lot more polite than it really is.
Life…it’s just an “F” in lie.
tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes
I think a clear conscience is really just memory loss.